Blogging into a space as ephemeral as a textarea is stupid. Who ever came up with that dumb idea? A browser is such a horrible place to be typing.

So yea, I was starting to blog about how depressed I had been this week and about finally feeling better, when I thought that I shouldn't be using my browser to blog because it has a tendency to get ignored and then closed when I have 10 or more tabs open and I forget that I've poured a half an hour of my soul into a textarea. So I've been searching for a good desktop blogging tool for a long time. All of the free ones suck. Not that they suck a little, but they suck a whole lot, and they suck a whole lot of ass. A lot of people like Ecto, but it's $18. That sucks. I can see why people like it though. I've been using it for less than 5 minutes and I can't really find any suckage so far. In fact, all of the things that made me say "I hate this piece of software!" about all those other blogging tools are completely non-existent in Ecto. All of the default preferences are what I would have picked anyway. I've got 21 days on the trial. Maybe I will buy it.

Anyway, I have had a pretty crappy week, but like I said I think I am feeling better. The thing about depression is that you don't really know if it is real or just temporary. I started to wonder why I am like this, and what has changed. Oddly enough, I was never really depressed when I lived in Memphis. I think the main reason is that I had a goal and something to work towards. Lately I haven't had one. Things in my life just seem to be plodding along without any real direction. I have decided to change that though. I'm moving. I'm going to buy a house, well rather a condo probably, but I'm definitely going to move. That will give me something to do and for now that should be enough.

like my cactus when it's dry too long
alone even cacti die
alone everybody cries
alone everybody lies
alone everybody's fine